I probably won’t reblog today in spite of my parents. So I can show them I can be a functional adult without a computer.
I had no idea headaches could get this bad. I’m scared that if I go up there someone’s going to fucking shit on my parade and say why are you up. I’ll be like hlgee I don’t fucking know.
I won’t say that because I’ll just go back to where I started. I get to see Matt today and that calms me a little to know that he will be here. But I’m just a bit… Ugh right now.
If they control almost every aspect of my life after I’m 18 I’m ollies outie and moving the fuck out. I don’t care if it’s the middle of the highschool year. I need out.
What’s funny is that my step mom allowed his aggressive actions towards me last night. I knew fucking deep down she wanted to stop him because I was basically shaken to the point I was shaking really bad. And I heard her in the background “Mike stop its going a little far” but then comes back and proceeds to tell me what great life I have and I’m a fucking princess and people have worse off than I do.
I was going to say depression is not a contest, but I didn’t want to make the situation worse.
It’s the “I’m sorta fearing for my life” scared and mental, “Holy shit I’m fucking afraid of my parents”
I can’t sleep. My head is literally spinning in circles screaming “I’m scared!” A thousand times. I don’t know what they are going to do. I don’t want them to take control of all my actions. I’m so afraid for myself for the next year.
Tell me how fucked up this is: my dad expected a hug from me after an hour of lecturing me, taking everything away from me basically, and making me have an on the spot panic attack. And when he didn’t receive he chucked my computer across the room and proceeded to tell me fuck you 10 times.
songs in a different language you like and then you look up the lyrics and it’s actually some fucked up shit
Not being able to kiss someone you really rEALLY REALLY wanna kiss is kinda sad and very dumb.